Broken Choices by AuttumnButterflylives
by Twi NonCanon Contest
Summary: Bella is talked into attending a dating auction by her best friend. Little did she know that the devil wears a best mask of all. Can Bella ever truly let her desires be explored, or will she forever hide behind what is expected of her


**Title:** Broken Choices

 **Summary:** Bella is talked into attending a dating auction by her best friend. Little did she know that the devil wears a best mask of all. Can Bella ever truly let her desires be explored, or will she forever hide behind what is expected of her?

 **Pairing:** Bella/Peter

 **Rating:** T

 **Word Count** : 4087

 **DISCLAIMER:** Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

The crowd was a mass of black as the bright lights from above shown as spotlights on us. We stood, side by side, with our arms down as our sides. Apparently, this was to be a submissive pose. Given what type of auction this was for, it was no wonder why we were required to have such a pose.

How had I even let myself be talked into this? This wasn't me. I never took risks. I never would even dare to think about doing this, let alone be seen in this type of building.

So how did I find myself here, in a place I never once thought of once, let alone twice? The reason was standing right beside me. My best friend, Alice.

Hours earlier, she had come to me and demanded that I had to tag along with her. That was of course after the night before that I complained I was a boring person. I didn't like to go out and party or try to meet people. The only people I knew other than my family was everyone at church and school. But when graduation came upon us less than a month ago, most of our classmates left the small town without looking back once.

I wished I was one of them. Just to be able to leave everything behind and move on. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, and still didn't. I didn't understand how any eighteen-year-old could know what exactly they wanted out of life other than a great career and happiness.

I had no idea what I was going to do. Most likely, I'd follow my parent's footsteps. I didn't want to though. Growing up with church loving parents tended to make me see the world with wide open eyes yet closed off to the idea of being a risk taker. I was the oddball of the family. I was just different and saw the world in a wider view. Even if my parents tended to shelter me my entire life, I still knew right from wrong. My gut told me that.

Dad was the pastor of the church in our town of a thousand people. Mom was not only a school teacher, but also the Sunday school teacher to most of the community. Because of them, I was known by the entire town. Everyone knew everyone, so that made being here even more worrisome about what would happen.

Don't get me wrong, I loved being close to the town, people, and God himself. I just was tired of being expected to take more of a role inside the church. Dad wanted me to be one of the team leaders. Which meant I would have to be busy planning for bible studies five days a week. It wasn't something that seemed fun. It didn't call my name like traveling around the world did.

Sure, I liked church and enjoyed attending bible studies weekly, but that didn't mean I wanted to plan them or be more of a teacher than I was. It didn't feel like it was my calling.

My calling was somewhere outside of those walls. I just didn't know what that was yet.

Alice thought that bribing me to come to this _fun_ party tonight would help broaden my horizons. She also didn't want to come alone. She was like me in some ways. She wanted to find what her true calling was outside of our small town. She also saw the world in a much brighter way of life. Somehow, she had found out about tonight through some Facebook event and jumped at the chance, dragging me right along with her.

Unlike me, she loved to take risks and try something new weekly. If there was an award to how many new things you could try in live by a certain age, she'd win it.

Alice, all four feet and seven inches of her, was full of energy and optimistic. She had been vibrating with happiness since she got me to agree to this. If only I could get some of that. I was nervous and wanted to go back home. Screw the sign-up cost.

Of course, my best friend would never let me do that. It was merely luck that she got me here in the first place.

"Welcome to the second auction of the year!" boomed a loud female voice over the speakers around the room. "So many new faces tonight. For those of you who don't know, this is a BDSM auction. If you don't know that term, then you are in the wrong place and I ask for you to leave. The bidders are in the stands, the person you want to bid on stands on the stage. Like the time before, I will tell you a small bit about each lady, or man, that stands on the stage who is willing to get a small profit out of the bidding war to go on one single date with one lucky man or woman. If you both hit it off, great. If not, then I'll most likely see you again around these parts.

"Now," she said, lowing her voice. "Let's get this fun night started!"

The names were drawn randomly, as no one in the stands knew for sure just who was up here on the stage. The black masks we wore over our eyes helped hide our identity. Thankfully, I did agree on that part. I didn't want anyone to know who I was. What would I do if someone I knew from church was here? I highly doubted anyone I could possibly know would ever show their face here of all places, though. I certainly shouldn't even be here myself.

Luckily, I wasn't one of the first to be called upon. With this being my first time, I had no idea what to expect. Alice had no idea either. Doing online research only went so far.

"Next up to win one of the hearts that showed up today is Miss Swan," announced the female voice. "Submissive in nature. Some of her hobbies are crafting, reading, and enjoying the outdoors. Let the bidding start!"

A round of numbers were called out, some louder than others. With each increase in price, my stomach twisted with nerves. Why did I allow Alice to talk me into doing this? This wasn't me. I knew without a doubt that my parents would look at me differently if they knew. They would possibly throw me into the loony bin for even thinking of attending something like this.

"Sold! Mr. Whitlock is the winner!"

There was a round of applause, along with Alice's small shriek of shocked happiness. I hadn't paid attention to how much the man bided on me. It didn't really matter, mostly.

Once off the stage, I knew where to meet my blind date. She had told us what needed to be done after our bidder had won a date.

She had even made sure that we understood that this was on our free will and that we didn't have to agree to meet outside in public if we were not comfortable to do so. I had to wonder if was just mandatory to go over everything little thing, or if they had an incident happen before.

Once I was standing in front of the wall, I felt as if I was going to throw up. I knew coming here wasn't something I should have ever considered doing. I wanted to go back home. Just too bad that Alice wouldn't let me leave that easily. Nor this man that now took me in from head to toe as he stood in front of me. He easily towered me as I stood in my five foot two of glory.

Behind his mask, I could just barely make out his dark blue eyes, round cheeks, and straight nose. His light blond hair almost white in the dim lighting. The small dusting of facial hair only added to his entire appeal.

He didn't speak, instead held out his hand for me to take. I glanced from his masked face to his hand and back again. My heart pounded a million miles an hour in my chest, as if it was a motor all on its own.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss Swan," he spoke after a moment, dropping his hand in the process.

I knew that voice, but from where? I couldn't find a face to match it, either.

I gave a tight-lipped smile in return. My mouth didn't want to work. I stood frozen. My body refused to do anything for me all of a sudden.

"I think you've made her speechless," Alice said as she nearly bounced to where we stood. She had a huge smile on her face as she looked between us.

I felt bad that I hadn't paid attention to her auction, but what did she expect? I was so far out of my element here, I didn't know what to do.

"There's a coffee shop just around the block," he began once his eyes met mine. "So, we can talk."

"Okay," I breathed. I was sure he wasn't even able to hear my one-word answer as it passed my lips.

"Be gentle to her," Alice said my way before she glued her eyes to the man that came to claim her. It was merely a breath later when the man who had won her smashed his lips to hers.

Quickly turning my eyes away from the couple, I couldn't help but think that my friend had known exactly what to expect tonight. I didn't think she'd ever lie to me, though. Alice knew people here, that was no secret, but how much did she really know about this?

"Let's get the price of all this taken care of, first, shall we?" Mr. Whitlock asked, holding out his hand once more.

This time, I laid my hand in his gently. I wasn't sure why I was so frightened to touch him. I've shaken plenty of hands at church all my life. Why was now any different?

At the simple touch, my body felt as though it knew exactly who this man was to me.

It couldn't be possible.

I've felt like this once before. Four years ago, in fact.

No.

I refused to believe this was fate. My parents would hate me.

He led me around the wall and to the small office like room. The light was brighter in here, and I could see just how blonde his hair really was. I was a small step behind him as he leads the way. He knew right where he was going, and I was happy to follow him.

I think I'd willing follow him to Hell if he chooses to lead me there. I was afraid that was just where I was going to go.

After handing over the amount of money, I got my ten percent that I won. Maybe the thousand that the man bided was well worth it. This little bit of money would help start my savings account to get out of the enclosed town I wanted away from.

"We don't really need these on now," he mumbled, pulling off his mask from around his eyes.

My eyes widened in surprise. "Peter?"

"Hey darling," he smiled, taking the invite to remove my own mask and folding both into his back pocket. "We have a bit to talk about."

That was an understatement.

The last time I had saw him was right before he had gone off to enlist into the army. Peter was eighteen, four years older than I was and I had never heard from him again. That last time, I really thought I would never see him again as he had made sure to give me a long hug with whispered words.

Why was he back? Why here? How did he even know I would be here?

"Come on," he coaxed, taking ahold of my hand once more and leading me out of the room. "Here's isn't the best place to talk."

"Hey, B! Will you need a ride home?" Alice asked as she passed us by.

"I'll make sure she gets home," Peter said with a smile. "I won't keep her out late."

"She's staying at my house tonight," Alice stated. "Her parents."

"Understood," he nodded before leading me away. I looked behind me, seeing Alice give me a little wave with her fingers.

I simply rolled my eyes. Her mind was always in the gutter, and there was no way I'd ever sleep with a man. Let alone on the first date. Or to a man that I once thought I knew.

What kind of girl was my friend trying to turn me into here?

I remained silent, lost in thought, as Peter lead me out of the building and around the corner. Right where he said it would be. Surprisingly, it was still opened with it being semi-late. Or maybe it was just because I was a small-town girl that I found it strange for a coffee shop to be opened at a little past nine on a Saturday night.

He held onto my hand the entire way. It was as though he was afraid that I was going to disappear. Who knows, maybe I would. My thoughts certainly had.

I was in a daze as he held the door open as we entered into the almost too warm coffee shop. Peter even held out my chair before he went and ordered us drinks.

As he did so, I took a look around the small, homey, hole in the wall cafe. There was a stack of books on tables dusted around the room. The lighting wasn't too bright, nor was it too dark. The entire front of the shop was made of glass windows with coffee decals randomly placed. I even spotted some breads and cakes up by the counter.

"Here you go," Peter said, setting a huge red mug in front of me before taking his own seat. His orange mug was filled to the brim with almost black coffee. Mine was covered with foamy cream on the top. "French Carmel with extra cream."

"Thank you," I said, wrapping my hands around the warmth.

"Of course, Bella," he said, giving me a wink that went straight to my gut. "How have you been?"

"Same as always," I answered.

"That good, huh?" His eyes seemed to see more than I was willing to give away.

"I'm alive," I answered. "What more should I expect?"

There was no way I'd ever share how I really felt. I would gladly die with the broken heart I carried around with me. I'd carry the secrets that I carried on my shoulders just to keep them locked away forever. Not even Alice knew some of the things I kept inside my soul.

"There's so much out there," he said, moving his hand around in the air as if he was talking about the entire world. Well, that was exactly what he was talking about. "You don't have to stay in that suffocating town, you know. There is so many things out there to explore and experience. Trying everything there is to try is the true way to happiness."

I wondered if that was why he left? Did he get to see the world? Did he tire of it and that's why he returned? Why did I even care?

My heart hurt that he had left, and it still hurt after all these years. Peter had been the one person other than Alice that I had felt comfortable enough to express my hatred for what I was expected to do. He had been there to listen to my rants when I had to use my free time at the church helping during the summer.

In the end, I hadn't minded as Alice was quick to volunteer with me to keep me sane. I knew that without her, I would have been extremely unhappy with how my life was turning out to be. I still wasn't happy, and I wasn't sure I'd ever truly be able to. I was meant for something else, but no one was letting me figure that out. Including myself.

"Let me show you what the world is like outside of that town you call home, darling," Peter said as I remained quiet. "Let me show you how much you are missing out."

"All that," I said pointing towards the door. "That's not me. This isn't me. I shouldn't have come here tonight."

"I'm glad you came, Bella," he said, folding his arms across the table. "I'm not the same boy that left four years ago."

"No, you certainly aren't," I said quietly, letting my eyes slip from him. He was a full man now, and he knew exactly want he wanted out of life. He knew what kind of sins that the world held.

And I would forever be lost in this life that was leading me nowhere. Sure, my parents would tell me that the life I was leading would be worth more than I could ever think it to be. My life was to be a gift and used to share the word of God and doing godly things.

My heart craved to do more. My soul demanded me to explore the wide world out there beyond what I knew. But my head knew that was never going to be option.

Ever.

"Give me a chance, at least," he pleaded. "Please. I know my leaving hurt you. But I had to leave. I had to get away while I could. I may have changed, but it was all in a good way. I know you want more out of life. And I can help you."

"Why?"

"Because I want to," he answered simply.

Only if life were that easy, that simple.

"Okay," I sighed, letting my shoulders drop. "I'll at least hear you out."

"Thank you," he said, looking at me through his lashes as he dipped his head. He took in a deep breath before he lifted his eyes fully to mine. It was as if a switch had been turned on. His eyes demanded my attention. Demanded everything from me.

And I was pretty darn sure Hell just opened up and swallowed me whole.

"Tell me, what do you know of BDSM?

"More than anyone like me should," I answered, feeling my cheeks blush and my palms sweat.

Most people really thought I was perfect. I went to church, followed the rules, and obey the God given laws. It was ingrained into me to do just that.

Little did everyone know I did do research. My thoughts were not so perfect.

Okay, it was mostly thanks to Alice. She read some book her mother had stashed away in the attic and it had gained her interest. With me being her only friend that she trusted, she told me all about it.

"Let me guess. Alice?"

"Did you even need to guess?" I asked in return.

"She will get you in trouble one of these days, darling," he said, shaking his head. He wasn't all that surprised that my best friend would no doubt do just that. If it wasn't for Alice, I certainly wouldn't have been willing to do a lot of the things I've gotten myself into the past year. I also know that I would have turned into myself more than I already had.

"And I'll be the only one that can get her out of whatever she finds herself into," I counted.

"I missed you, Bella," he said, giving me a sad smile.

"Then you shouldn't have left like you did." I wanted to add as he left without saying another word that day.

"How much do you know about the lifestyle?" I blinked. Was I willing to tell him exactly what I knew? I didn't know everything, but I got the jist of all it well enough.

"Enough so know that you are a dom," I said slowly, dropping my eyes to the table. "And that I am a sub."

"That you certainly are," he said.

Peter lifted my chin with his pointer finger. Once my eye met his, he seemed to be debating on what to say. What was he really thinking? What did he see? Who was I to him?

Finally, after what felt like a lifetime, he spoke. "I can show you what my lifestyle is like. I can share my experience on why I love to have control. I can share why I enjoy what I have learned, promising you that you will like it just as much. I can show you just what you mean to me, Bella Swan. Your parents don't ever have to know, if you don't want them to. But you are an adult. You are free to make your own choices. I will be here, waiting for your choice. I will never push you into this life that I enjoy, but I would like nothing more than to share it with you. I will never force you to try anything with me." Pausing, he let the words soak into me.

"After tonight, we can part ways and never look back. We can part and never see each other again, if you so desire."

"And if I want to try this – whatever this is between us?" I asked, my breath a whisper.

"Then I'm all for it. I'll do whatever I have to for you to give it a chance."

Could I really do this? What would everyone think?

I knew without a doubt that Alice would be all for this. That was how she got me talked into this anyhow. But would I be able to try this sort of lifestyle without worry about anyone finding out? Would I be able to keep this a secret from my parents, who saw right through me when I told a white lie?

More importantly, if this didn't work out, what would happen? Would I be able to just walk away unscratched? Would we just leave each other's lives and never see one another again?

Peter had been my best friend. When he left, he took my heart with him and I acted like it hadn't bothered me. I was positive that if he broke my heart again, I'd never recover.

Was risking my heart and soul on a man who promised to show me the world worth the price I'd have to pay?

No. No it wasn't.

"I can't," I said, tears filling my eyes. "I can't risk my life to try."

"Okay," he said, not arguing. He wanted to but didn't.

Instead, he dropped his hand from my chin and cupped his mug of chilled coffee. I had forgotten all about our drinks.

"Why? Why not risk it?"

"I can't lose you again. If you choose to just up and leave like you did before, I'd never survive, Peter. I may have held it together last time, but I won't be able to do it again. There is too much at stake," I rambled, looking anywhere but him.

"Like what?" he asked, his voice a demandingly.

"My parents would never look at me the same. They would most likely disown me. You saw how they acted towards Jessica when she got pregnant by a one-night stand. I can't risk losing what have now. What if you get called back to serve? What if you die? I can't risk more than friendship."

"First off, I won't be called back to serve. I did my tour and I left the army. It wasn't for me. But because of what I saw, that is how I became to be who I am today. And how do you know if either one of us will die right as we walk out that door?"

"I can't risk it, Peter. I'm sorry," I said, a tear finally breaking free and falling down my cheek. "There is nothing I can offer you but my friendship."

My heart hurt, knowing that I was choosing wrong. My head knew it was the right thing to do, and there were no other options.

"Okay, darling," Peter said. "I'll be there if you ever change your mind."

I gave him a watery smile, hoping beyond hope that he was right.


End file.
